Escape to Beer Mountain: A Rope of Sand

Escape to Beer Mountain: A Rope of Sand is the first episode of Clone High.

Synopsis[]

It is the start of a new semester at Clone High High School, and Abe Lincoln hopes to make a move on Cleopatra at JFK's party. However, he will only be invited to the party if he brings beer. Meanwhile, Joan tries to win Abe's heart by starting up a Teen Crisis Hotline with Gandhi, who secretly ditches the hotline in order to go to the party. All the while, Principal Scudworth plans to crash the party in an attempt to better understand the students.

Plot[]

It is the first day back at school, and Abe finds himself falling for Cleopatra. She tells him that she will see him at JFK's party tonight, but the only way Abe and Gandhi could be invited is if they bring beer. They try and get Genghis Khan to pretend to be 21, but he messes up every time, so Abe can only buy non-alcoholic beer. Fortunately for him, everyone at the party believes they are under the influence, including Cleo, who kisses Abe. However, her current boyfriend, JFK, witnesses the two. After a brief encounter, an indecisive Cleo calls the Teen Crisis Hotline and Joan answers. She first tells Cleo to pick JFK but, upon seeing Abe's plight, changes her mind. Before anything else can happen, the police show up and attempt to bust the kids for underage drinking. The cop can only fit two people in the squad car, so he arrests Gandhi (because of his perceived drunkenness) and Joan because she is holding a beer. Abe begrudgingly admits that the beer he provided was non-alcoholic, which sets the partygoers free (albeit not without them laughing at Abe). Cleo leaves with JFK, but the next day she gives Abe a note that reads "Sorry, Luv Cleo".

Meanwhile, Joan wants Abe to go out with her. When she hears Abe say that he likes Cleo because of "her commitment to community service", she starts a Teen Crisis Hotline, but the only people who volunteer are Gandhi and Mr. Sheepman. Later, Joan wants to go to JFK's party and asks Gandhi if he will stay behind to work the hotline. He initially promises to Joan that he will stay behind, but later attends the party, having transferred any incoming calls to his cell phone. Gandhi gets a call from Van Gogh and, trying to impress everyone, puts him on speakerphone, causing everyone to laugh at Van Gogh's depression. Later on, an unamused Joan finds out that Gandhi came to the party, forcefully taking back control of the Teen Crisis Hotline by tasing Gandhi. The next day, Van Gogh paints an unflattering mural of naked Gandhi as revenge for Gandhi embarrassing him the previous night. Everyone starts to laugh except for Gandhi and Abe.

In-between these events, Principal Scudworth is tasked to a report on what it is like to be a teenager for the Secret Board of Shadowy Figures. He interrogates Joan in an attempt to find out, but with little success. He then dresses as a student and goes to JFK's party with his robot companion, Mr. Butlertron. After failing to convince the students, he was beaten heavily like a pinata by Genghis Khan. In the end, Mr. Butlertron reports back to the Secret Board and informs them that Scudworth has indeed experienced what being a teenager is like.

Characters[]

Major Roles[]

Minor Roles[]

Trivia[]

When Abe, Joan, and Gandhi first make it to the school, DNA Dan is pictured on the bulletin board.
Gandhi and Cleo apparently have history, with Gandhi been Cleo's foster brother for ten years and even donating one of his kidneys to her. On the contrary, Cleo does not remember anything about him.
Principal Scudworth titles his report, "What It's Like to Be a Teenage Clone: A Rope of Sand", parodying the title of the episode. Mr. Butlertron then critically acclaims the title, saying that it draws the reader (A.K.A. "viewer") in without giving too much away.
JFK mentions having a list of one hundred and fifty women he plans to sleep with this year, and Cleo occupies numbers 1 and 2 on the list.
The original MTV airing of the episode had the song "I Don't Want to Wait" by Paula Cole playing when Joan of Arc shed a tear at the party. In later releases, the song was replaced by "Standard Lines" by Dashboard Confessional.

Production Information[]

This episode was completed on July 9, 2002.^[1]

Cultural References[]

The first part of the title is a reference to the film Escape to Witch Mountain, the second part of the title is a reference to series co-creator Christopher Miller's roommate, who dared him to add "A Rope of Sand" to the title of every paper while studying at Dartmouth College.
Gandhi goes into the bathroom and asks Abe if he's dropping a Lincoln Log.
Peany, the bio-engineered anthropomorphic peanut, seems to be a parody of Mr. Peanut.
The International House of Beer is a parody on IHOP's full name, the International House of Pancakes.
Principal Scudworth is a fan of American late-night talk show host Jay Leno.
Scudworth compares himself to Dian Fossey, a gorilla primatologist, studying his clone students and referring to them as "the gorillas". He even references to her movie, Gorillas in the Mist.
JFK mentions the show My Two Dads when on the Teen Crisis Hotline.
JFK's house has a Patrick Nagel print hanging in the living room.
Gandhi standing on a dinghy boat in the middle of the hot tub and staring longingly at the sky is a reference to certain commercial bumpers for Dawson's Creek, where Dawson Leery would do the same in a dinghy boat in the creek, as seen here.
Gandhi addresses the Sheriff as "Kojak", in reference to the 1970's cop drama Kojak.

Historical References[]

JFK brags about having sex with Marilyn Monroe, saying that he "invaded her Bay of Pigs". This is a reference to the Bay of Pigs Invasion, a military invasion of Cuba authorized by the real JFK in an attempt to overthrow Fidel Castro.
One of the Elvis Twins overdoses by consuming a jar of tranquilizers, quoting "I have left the building" while passed out on the floor. This alludes to the real life Elvis Presley's cause of death, and the famous quote used to inform the public of his death.
Cleo mistakenly addresses Gandhi by the name "Benji". This could possibly be a reference to Benjamin Mays, a non-violent civil rights leader who drew from the teachings of Mahatma Gandhi.
Gandhi greets JFK in the bathroom by chummily pointing finger guns at him. JFK flinches in fear at this. In real life, both Gandhi and JFK were assassinated via firearms.
George Washington Carver's genetic modification of a peanut is a reference to the real life George Washington Carver's numerous attempts at making peanut-related products.
Cleo tells Abe she's always seen him as "honest", a jab at the real life Abraham Lincoln's nickname, "Honest Abe".
When Abe gets arrested, Henry Rathbone points and laughs at him. When he does, he holds a position emulating that of the original Rathbone in the famous Currier and Ives print, depicting the assassination of Abraham Lincoln. In the context of the print, Rathbone is rising and pointing out John Wilkes Booth as he witnesses him shooting Abraham Lincoln.
Eleanor Roosevelt's lecherous comment on Joan's body (after sending the latter to the principal office for talking in class) is a reference to historical rumors about her sexuality.
Van Gogh's bedroom is based on a painting by the real Vincent Van Gogh, Bedroom in Arles.

Errors[]

When Abe warns Gandhi about the three story drop from Mr. Sheepman's classroom window to the ground, his hair briefly turns black.
In the close up of Peany in his jar, the top of the glass is the same color at the lid and the outline separating the bottom of the lid from the rest of the class is gone.
After Joan kicks JFK, the hair on the right side of her head disappears.
Gandhi drunkenly danced on the hood of the cop's car, shirtless, but in the frame where the cop picked up and dropped Gandhi, he wears a dark blue shirt.
When Van Gogh is talking about his problems, the phone he’s using looks like a corded phone, which inexplicably switches to a cordless one once he starts crying.